Friday, June 29, 2012


If you know that my title is not a misspelling then you can keep reading...

The best-friends-who-have-finally-decided-to-read-Harry-Potter list has gone up to THREE!!! I am ecstatic. Earlier this month while embarking on another long road trip I [for the THOUSANTH time...more like EVERY time I get in a car] thought how unbelievably amazing it would be to just be able to Apparate. I could LIVE in Athens, WORK at Disney World, and go to the beach for the day every weekend. I could zip on over to Paris for the evening and never have to pay for lodging anywhere. Besides the money it could save, think about the TIME you could have. Even the tiniest minutes that you spend driving to work daily, gone. It would absolutely be my "if you could have one magical power."

However, in discussing our thoughts on book 5, I started thinking about how much I wished I could also have a Pensieve. When my thoughts, my mind, my LIFE get so close to overwhelming...what I wouldn't do for the ability to just remove those thoughts, save them for a rainy day. If I could just extract them in a single strand of silver and place them inside a pensieve for further review, when I had, no, to make space for, more rational thinking. How about the stories? "Did I ever tell you about the time... No? Oh, well let me SHOW you. Come with me INTO MY MEMORY AND SEE EXACTLY AS I SAW IT." Yeah, that'd be so super cool...

Well, I've realized that my blog is the closest thing to a Pensieve I will ever have, which is terribly depressing, and not even CLOSE to what a real Pensieve would have to offer me...but exactly where I go to release the overwhelming thoughts swirling around in my head threatening to overflow at any second...and here we are. It's going to be a loooong post, I fear. Maybe I'll break it down into two posts...

After the best Spring and start of a birthday year, possibly, in my life, I crashed into an unforeseen wall.  With the end of my time with the twin and MISSING them EVERY DAY...It's been SO HARD! I feel like I've lost everything that was making life so easy for me. The non-structure of my life makes me feel like it is crumbling around me...No more schedules or routines--which I thrive on. I miss everything about our day. Bottle mixing in my chemistry lab, diaper change wrestling matches, bouncing on an exercise ball for hours; the constant companions, walking buddies, shopping pals...tiny people who need me, LOVE me, and thought I was hilarious. (They ADORED my lunchtime comedy routine...I mean have you seen me sing and dance show tunes (slightly under the influence of International Delights Sweet Cream coffee creamer and coffee)?! I'm the best Newsie/Galinda/Fiona/Rapunzel they've ever SEEN! (And if they knew how to clap, or stand...) I'd get standing ovations every time...)

I love the touch, the constant tugging, climbing and crawling all over me, sitting in my lap, on my hip, in my arms. When they lay their heads on my shoulder, or bury their heads in my neck or chest...I love it. I'm so thankful I have them laughing as I tickled them recorded. My car looks naked without car seats and my stroller is offended that it got put up in a closet. Now it seems strange that I have baby sunscreen in my pool bag. I miss the solitude, my simple, quiet, day...Living the tempo of a God-breathed life? Island time? Gone...I'm stressed all. the. time!!!

So if I had a Pensieve I would climb in every night after work and watch memories of simpler times with twins and cupcakes and frolicking through the meadows.

1 comment:

  1. Awww sad. :( I think the twins' mom should read this and immediately hire you back.