I was completely packed by the time I left for the retreat and so there was little to no anxiety about that and all I had to do was run a few errands when I returned home--and try to find a bathing suit! The biggest problem I was encountering was that I was exhausted. All I wanted to do was sleep until I woke up. I fell asleep talking on the phone, which I have never done before...I was just so tired.
I went to one last Jamaica meeting and was pretty useless. It was good though and I am glad I was there for a little while. I finished all of the tasks that I could before I took my last warm shower and got in my bed for the last time for a month.
I had a hard time with all of the good byes, which isn't unusual, but it was different this time. I didn't cry at all, which is SO unusual, and didn't even lose it after I'd said goodbye and people left me. I pretty much just crashed.
The next morning I was still really wiped out from the week before, weekend retreat and now the 4:30 am wake-up, but I still did really well. I didn't cry until I got left at the airport and then it all came out. I wished at least one person I knew would be there with me. I wish people could still see you to your gate before they had to leave. I wish that I had gone ahead and gotten upset while I still had people around. But instead I gave lots of people in the airport and on the plane a good opportunity to use their imaginations as to WHAT was wrong with me.